Respect

At the heart of every successful relationship, whether it's business or personal, lies respect. If you're in a relationship in which you either don't respect the other person or aren't respected by the other person, you'll want to seriously consider leaving it. Because the more you think about it, the more you'll realize that without respect, all those other important ingredients of a good relationship such as love and trust can't flourish at all.

When you truly respect someone, you don't lie to them, cheat on them, demean them, steal from them, speak badly about them, try to control them, invade their privacy, ignore what's important to them, or want anything less for them than their most glorious dreams.

If you happen to be in an intimate relationship in which you're being chronically disrespected, don't fall in to the trap of believing that if you hang around long enough, putting up with your partner, it will somehow prove to him or her how much you care; and then someday (ah that elusive "someday"), when you partner finally realizes the depth of your love, you'll earn the respect you've been longing for. Sadly, that hardly ever happens, because you can never earn respect by tolerating disrespect.

Other people's ideals, beliefs or ways of living can be different from yours, so just because they didn't live up to your expectations doesn't mean they're disrespectful. Also, people can behave negatively because of their own insecurities, health factors, chemical imbalance, fear, greed, anger and so on.

It's not always about you - so don't take it personally. Nevertheless you still have to decide if that's healthy situation to allow yourself to be a part of. Will "sticking around" serve your better purpose? You are ultimately the decision-maker whether you want to "stick-around" to be either intentionally or unintentionally disrespected. Another person's behavior to disrespect you is truly your own dilemma if you choose to remain and accept.

The fundamental ingredients of respect and trust are the foundation of all successful relationships. Difficult as it is, there's one thing you can do to earn respect from a person who's in the habit of disrespecting you. You have to distance yourself from them, not just emotionally or mentally, but physically. Don't threaten to leave unless you mean it, and when you mean it, do it. If you can't do it for yourself and your precious spirit that deserves respect, do it for the other person, and the lesson they need to learn that for every act of disrespect, there really is a price to pay.

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Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd