Looking at the people around you, you probably think that you're the only one who gets timid and unsure of yourself. But any time you feel your confidence shrivelling, you're not alone. Everyone feels fear and self-doubt, probably more often than you know but because you're not them, you don't feel or see it. You only feel your own fear so keenly because you're the one experiencing it.
In a world where so little is certain, one of the few things you can have an unshakeable faith in is yourself. It's the one thing you can count on in unfamiliar social situations, when going for an interview, meeting a date, asserting your rights, recovering after a setback, or simply for peace of mind. That's why a healthy sense of self-esteem is so important.
Now the first step to reducing our self-doubt and increasing our self-confidence is to realise that most of our fears are irrational. Many of us still go around behaving as though we were frightened little kids on the first day of school, having to dodge the bully and comform to strict rules or risk being punished.
Perhaps it's remnants of an oppressed childhood still haunting you, but understand that those days are gone. You're your own person now, capable of deciding what you want to do and how you want to feel. You don't have to try to "fit in" anymore, and you don't need anyone's approval. You are you, and no one should be able to tell you that that's wrong or abnormal or not up to the standard.
In order to overcome your fears, identify just what they are, how logical they are, and how you can get rid of them. For example, before an intimidating event or situation, write down exactly what you're uncomfortable about. Is it a reasonable fear? What consequences are likely to result from it? What's the worst that can happen? How can you conquer this fear?
You'll find that as you go along, most of these fears are inconsequential, or at least will not have any devastating, long-term effects. Even something like flunking a job interview doesn't mean you won't succeed at others. Most of the time, just being yourself is the way to go. Not having to pretend takes a lot of the pressure off and makes you more relaxed and natural. Just remember, you may think that being yourself is not good enough, but the truth is, people value honesty and sincerity above most other things. Very simply, people will appreciate you just for being you.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Go With the Flow
Life is like a raging river. There is constant flow. In fact, agitation and movement are essential for life to endure. Stagnant waters breed disease and decay.
So when life decides to throw a rock at us, like when we lose a job or partner, don't lose heart. Don't negatively judge events or circumstances that initially seem "bad" or "unfortunate". Things don't happen by accident, and mistakes or misfortunes are simply precursors for positive change.
We can't control things like losing a job or losing a partner. Loss is essential for growth and survival. When we experience loss or some other stressful change in our lives, we can give in to negative feelings like anger, disappointment, self-pity, self-loathing, trepidation and fear. We can allow these emotions to strain our mind, effectively crippling its ability to discover viable solutions. We can imagine the worst, and let something that may not come to pass affect our present state of mind.
Or we can go with the flow of change. Some things in our lives have to go in order to make way for better things. The Universe has a way of nudging us along when we get too lazy, complacent or comfortable. Occasionally, it gives us a big shove. The Universe knows when stagnation is making us fat and feeble. It knows when something in our lives has to shift in order for us to continue growing. It then arranges for people and events to push us towards what we were meant to be.
Most people however, choose to resist or ignore the signs. They are so firmly embedded in the riverbed that they refuse to let the currents lift them away. The years go by, and along with them, a flood of lost opportunities? and the stubborn rocks are finally left buried under algae and dirt.
If you've recently lost your job, lost a partner or something you felt was valuable to you, think? Were you really happy with your job?
Did you put your dreams on hold because you were trapped in a wake up, go to work, go home, go to bed routine? Had you stopped growing in that job? Did nothing excite you anymore about your work? What about your ex-partner? Were you really good for each other? Or were you hanging on because you were afraid of being alone?
You didn't have the time nor the nerve to go out and do what you really wanted to do. Well, now you do!
Go with the flow of change!
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
STORIES - The Triple Filter Test
In ancient Greece, scholar and philosopher Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high esteem.
One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, "Do you know what I just heard about one of your friends?"
"Hold on a minute," Socrates replied. "Before telling me anything, I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test."
"Triple filter?" asked the man.
"That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you're going to say. That's why I call it the triple filter test. The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"
"No," the man said, "actually I just heard about it and wanted to tell it to you." "All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?"
"No, on the contrary, it is bad."
"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about him, but you're not certain it's true. You may still pass the test though, because there's one filter left - the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?"
"No, not really," replied the man, now more than a little embarrassed.
"Well," concluded Socrates, if what you want to tell me is neither true, nor good, and nor even useful to me, why tell it to me at all?"
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Add Value in the Workplace
We all want to be promoted, get higher salaries, and become more valued at the workplace. But what steps are you taking towards attracting a promotion? Do you have a plan? What are you currently doing that makes you believe that you are deserving of one?
The most miserable people in the world today are those who know what they need to do to create the life they desire, but they refuse to take the actions to do so. So what can you do?
In today's business culture, productivity is the key to promotion. Every employer by reason of economics is forced to look at the bottom line. So here are three steps to increase your productivity, and thus add value in the workplace.
First, assess the desired result.
The clearer the desired outcome, the quicker you can take action. Always be certain you are on the same page as your employer regarding the desired outcome of a task. Don't assume the outcome you desire is the outcome your boss does.
Next, assess what actions must be taken immediately.
You may have ten, fifteen, or even fifty things to do on your plate right now, but do you know what to do next? Identifying the next action takes a matter of minutes, but is often a highly neglected practice. Look over your list of projects and ask yourself, what must I do next? Write it down. After you go through your projects and write out each action step, then determine the highest priority and get to work. You cannot do everything right now. All that matters is what you do right now and what you do next. A great question to ask is, "what action if done will be of the most benefit to you and the company?" or, "what action if not done will be most detrimental to your career success? "
And third, concentrate entirely on the most important task until it is complete.
Quickly solve every problem that comes your way and soon your stock will rise in the eyes of those who are looking for someone to promote. Allow time and your track record to speak on your behalf. Don't force the issue. Your ability to act quickly and get more done than anyone else will cause you to stand out. If you can create a memory in your supervisor's mind that you are person who can get the job done quickly and in excellence, more responsibility and opportunity will be given to you. Getting the job done quickly may mean the difference between you or someone else getting a promotion.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Journaling
The fountain of personal wisdom may be closer than you think. As close as your nearest pen actually. That's because the single most essential instrument for nurturing your spirit is a personal journal.
Journaling is a remarkable tool to help you discover the wisdom you already possess. Sometimes, this wisdom will surprise you. Other times, it will challenge you. Always, it will come directly from you, empowering you to trust yourself and to take action by giving you the deep-seated knowledge that you know more than you think you do.
This feeling of power and self-trust will translate into a more confident you. You will already know where to turn when faced with difficult decisions. You will have found the answers within yourself, and you will return there for further instruction.
Now, there a few rules to the game of journaling. You should write quickly, allowing the words to freefall form your subconcious. Keep writing, no matter wat. Don't edit, erase or cross-out any words. If you're heading in a direction you would rather avoid, start a new paragraph. Date each entry in your journal. Note that time, place, and any details regarding your mood and emotions that will be necessary for context when you read back on your work.
After you have finished a journal entry, take a walk or get up for a glass of water before you reread your entry, and remember to reread this entry with compassion. Then, write an insight Line - a sentence or two about what you think the piece is trying to tell you.
Get creative with the techniques you use. We all have a subconscious mind that communicates to us in a different way. If you are stuck and have nothing to write, try recoding snippets of conversations, facts, feelings, fantasies, descriptions, impressions, quotes, images, and ideas. Draw pictures. Make a collage from a magazine. Use the technique that best suits the way in which you express yourself.
One method that works well is called clustering. Put the central idea in the centre of the page and circle it. Then, without any pause, make associations, placing them in new bubbles and tying them to the main idea. The result is a complex matrix of ideas, many of which you didn't even know you had.
Whether you set a time for writing each day or you do it on the fly, make sure the time you spent writing in your journal is time solely devoted to you and your task. Your journal is designed to nurture you.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Journaling is a remarkable tool to help you discover the wisdom you already possess. Sometimes, this wisdom will surprise you. Other times, it will challenge you. Always, it will come directly from you, empowering you to trust yourself and to take action by giving you the deep-seated knowledge that you know more than you think you do.
This feeling of power and self-trust will translate into a more confident you. You will already know where to turn when faced with difficult decisions. You will have found the answers within yourself, and you will return there for further instruction.
Now, there a few rules to the game of journaling. You should write quickly, allowing the words to freefall form your subconcious. Keep writing, no matter wat. Don't edit, erase or cross-out any words. If you're heading in a direction you would rather avoid, start a new paragraph. Date each entry in your journal. Note that time, place, and any details regarding your mood and emotions that will be necessary for context when you read back on your work.
After you have finished a journal entry, take a walk or get up for a glass of water before you reread your entry, and remember to reread this entry with compassion. Then, write an insight Line - a sentence or two about what you think the piece is trying to tell you.
Get creative with the techniques you use. We all have a subconscious mind that communicates to us in a different way. If you are stuck and have nothing to write, try recoding snippets of conversations, facts, feelings, fantasies, descriptions, impressions, quotes, images, and ideas. Draw pictures. Make a collage from a magazine. Use the technique that best suits the way in which you express yourself.
One method that works well is called clustering. Put the central idea in the centre of the page and circle it. Then, without any pause, make associations, placing them in new bubbles and tying them to the main idea. The result is a complex matrix of ideas, many of which you didn't even know you had.
Whether you set a time for writing each day or you do it on the fly, make sure the time you spent writing in your journal is time solely devoted to you and your task. Your journal is designed to nurture you.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Creating a Life of Abundance
The Chinese New Year is near, and many of the traditional greetings that will be uttered and sent via email and SMS will have something to do with abundance. Prosperity, for example, is an abundance of monetary wealth. And when it comes to money, most people believe that you must work longer, harder, or be luckier than the next person if you are to ever achieve any type of financial security. It is a common belief that "money is hard to come by," or money doesn't grow on trees."
Well, although I have never seen a money tree, the concept of wealth creation can be much easier than most realize, or can imagine. Obviously though, money isn't the only aspect of living an abundant life. Abundance also includes good health, joy, love, satisfaction, and continuously working towards being all you can be.
To make matters simpler, there are actually 3 areas that determine a true sense of fulfillment, which must be balanced if you are to truly experience and enjoy life to the fullest.
These 3 key areas are Money, Health and Relationships.
If you had $30 million but your health was such that you couldn't get out of the house to enjoy it, it would have little value. If you had the same amount of money and great health but no one to share it with, life would be quickly become empty and meaningless.
By the same token, if you were absolutely broke, but enjoyed health relationships and outstanding health, it would be impossible to experience and fully enjoy those things that money can buy, which would allow you to do for yourself and those you love, whatever you would like.
With respect to money, it has been estimated that if the worlds wealth were divided amount the people of the world equally, there would be enough for every single person alive, children included, to live in a 3000 square foot home and have $7 million in cash! So why is it that some seem to have it all, while others scrape by from day to day just to pay the bills and keep food on the table?
Well, negative geopolitical factors aside, the answer is thoughts and emotions. These two incredibly powerful aspects of your life are what determine what you have or don't have. These two seemingly simple aspects of mind are the difference between living a life of overflowing abundance or barely getting by. This is because our thoughts and emotions form our beliefs. These beliefs are established, for the most part, when we are just young children and are based on the experiences of our parents, and what they were taught and came to believe as truth in their life.
Before we can create a life of abundance, we have to understand that three key areas contribute to its development - money, health and relationships. And when it comes to money, it's our thoughts and emotions that determine if we are financially secure or not. Our thoughts and emotions feed our beliefs and our beliefs are what drive our lives.
Many people believe that the occurrences that happen in their day to day lives happen because that is "Just the way life is". what many fail to realize is that the reason these things happen as they do is because that is what they are attracting themselves through their belief system.
Take for instance Roger Bannister, the man who broke the all time record of running a 4 minute mile, on May 6th 1954. Until the time he accomplished that incredible feat, it was believed to be impossible, and beyond human ability to do so. That is until Roger Bannister came along, who broke the previous world record, and finished in an amazing 3 minutes 59.4 seconds! Once it was found that such a thing actually could be accomplished, that record has since been broken many times! Once people actually believed that it was possible, it became much more so!
Look at your own life. What self limiting beliefs have you allowed to hold you back from accomplishing your most sought after dreams and deepest desires? What unfulfilled dreams are you hesitating to act on because the world says that it's impossible?
You don't have to be a track start to create whatever it is that you desire in your life. You don't have to be someone else to achieve whatever you desire and enjoy more abundance in your life than you previously imagined. You don't have to be anything other than yourself.
So what is the secret of abundance?
There isn't one.
All that is necessary to attract all the abundance you could ever hope for, is for you to shed the self limiting beliefs that you have allowed to stored as your truth. All that is required is that you develope an awareness of the overflowing abundance and unlimited potential given to you.
You have the power to choose.
Change your beliefs and you can change your life.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Well, although I have never seen a money tree, the concept of wealth creation can be much easier than most realize, or can imagine. Obviously though, money isn't the only aspect of living an abundant life. Abundance also includes good health, joy, love, satisfaction, and continuously working towards being all you can be.
To make matters simpler, there are actually 3 areas that determine a true sense of fulfillment, which must be balanced if you are to truly experience and enjoy life to the fullest.
These 3 key areas are Money, Health and Relationships.
If you had $30 million but your health was such that you couldn't get out of the house to enjoy it, it would have little value. If you had the same amount of money and great health but no one to share it with, life would be quickly become empty and meaningless.
By the same token, if you were absolutely broke, but enjoyed health relationships and outstanding health, it would be impossible to experience and fully enjoy those things that money can buy, which would allow you to do for yourself and those you love, whatever you would like.
With respect to money, it has been estimated that if the worlds wealth were divided amount the people of the world equally, there would be enough for every single person alive, children included, to live in a 3000 square foot home and have $7 million in cash! So why is it that some seem to have it all, while others scrape by from day to day just to pay the bills and keep food on the table?
Well, negative geopolitical factors aside, the answer is thoughts and emotions. These two incredibly powerful aspects of your life are what determine what you have or don't have. These two seemingly simple aspects of mind are the difference between living a life of overflowing abundance or barely getting by. This is because our thoughts and emotions form our beliefs. These beliefs are established, for the most part, when we are just young children and are based on the experiences of our parents, and what they were taught and came to believe as truth in their life.
Before we can create a life of abundance, we have to understand that three key areas contribute to its development - money, health and relationships. And when it comes to money, it's our thoughts and emotions that determine if we are financially secure or not. Our thoughts and emotions feed our beliefs and our beliefs are what drive our lives.
Many people believe that the occurrences that happen in their day to day lives happen because that is "Just the way life is". what many fail to realize is that the reason these things happen as they do is because that is what they are attracting themselves through their belief system.
Take for instance Roger Bannister, the man who broke the all time record of running a 4 minute mile, on May 6th 1954. Until the time he accomplished that incredible feat, it was believed to be impossible, and beyond human ability to do so. That is until Roger Bannister came along, who broke the previous world record, and finished in an amazing 3 minutes 59.4 seconds! Once it was found that such a thing actually could be accomplished, that record has since been broken many times! Once people actually believed that it was possible, it became much more so!
Look at your own life. What self limiting beliefs have you allowed to hold you back from accomplishing your most sought after dreams and deepest desires? What unfulfilled dreams are you hesitating to act on because the world says that it's impossible?
You don't have to be a track start to create whatever it is that you desire in your life. You don't have to be someone else to achieve whatever you desire and enjoy more abundance in your life than you previously imagined. You don't have to be anything other than yourself.
So what is the secret of abundance?
There isn't one.
All that is necessary to attract all the abundance you could ever hope for, is for you to shed the self limiting beliefs that you have allowed to stored as your truth. All that is required is that you develope an awareness of the overflowing abundance and unlimited potential given to you.
You have the power to choose.
Change your beliefs and you can change your life.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Happiness From Within
Many people believe that happiness is something that comes from external sources, like their profession, wealth, having the perfect mate or creating the ideal family. Holding on to such a belief hands control of our lives over to uncertain and unconcerned forces.
Truly happy people though, understand that they have the power to cultivate authentic happiness and become more optimistic about the future. These people recognize that life will endlessly throw challenges in their path. But they can decide how these challenges affect them. Such people view the future with optimistic hope and excitement as they create the life they want to live, creating joy from within.
So, what does it take to be happy from within?
Here are some simple suggestions to get you on track:
First and paramount, make happiness a habit, a way of life. Happiness is a choice that needs to be made every day, every hour, and even every minute. Genuinely happy people are so because they choose to be.
Cultivate mindfulness, In striving to be fully present in each moment, you can live a life of greater depth and meaning
Direct your daily thoughts. Thoughts can easily stray or be moulded by other people and factors. Be aware of the thoughts that you believe in as truths. In order to become aware of your thoughts, begin by writing down your thoughts. Then read what you have written and question whether or not these thoughts are helpful to you or realistic. Are they truths based on facts or just your own beliefs?
Live in a state of flow. Author Mihaly csikszentmihalyi suggested that flow is a state in which people are so involved in an activity that nothing else seems to matter. To achieve flow an activity must have the following components: the activity must be challenging, it must be clear in how it will progress meaning that the rules are simple, it must requre all of our concentration, and we must feel we are making progress and are in control. The more flow activities you incorporate into your life, the happier you will feel.
Now this is a really crucial tip - practice forgiveness. It is the path of inner happiness and peace. In genuinely forgiving another person, and don't forget forgiving yourself, you will feel a profound sense of healing. Not to mention more time and energy you can devote to other more rewarding things.
Genuinely happy people know that joy comes from within, not from outside sources. And here are some more ways you can cultivate happiness from within, and choose happiness as a habit, a way of life.
Develop discipline. By overindulging in food, alcohol, sex or other temporary gratifications, a weakening of our mind, body and soul can result. By practicing self discipline in our daily lives, we strengthen our mind and self-image because we promote a feeling that we are in control of our body. By using restraint, we achieve stability which leads to contentment.
Be an optimist. This includes, but is not limited to, perceiving problems as temporary, and not taking things personally. Such optimistic thinkers view the events that happen in their lives as always having a positive side. They choose to believe that ones ability to conquer hardship is determined by how one recovers from a setback. They hold on to the belief that nothing can hold them down permanently.
Simplify your life. Whenever I travel, I end up realising that I've over-packed. Essentially, I'm carting along baggage that I never use and don't really have to use. And look around you - your office, your bedroom. Going through your wardrobe alone should send you into spasms of regret over wasterd money. Life is needlessly bloated and complex these days. To restore a sense of balance to our lives, we must try to do less, own less, worry less and push ourselves and others less. I'm not saying that you should stop reaching for the stars or expecting the best, but if you look critically, there are meny things you can really afford to let go.
Exercise reguarly. Ah... I'm guilty of not doing enough myself. But daily exercise has a huge impact on how positive we feel about ourselves. Giving our body a regular workout helps reduce tension and stress. Regular exercie also helps to reduce fat, improves muscle tone, clears the skin, and promotes a general sense of energy and mobility.
And lastly, give love freely. Everyone loves being loved, and just as crucial, being told they're loved. But expressing love makes us feel good too. There is powerful magic in the sharing of giving and taking that creates great joy. And konwing that the person you love knows that you love him or her is an indescribable feeling that stays with you like a constant umbrella, shielding you from the rain.
These are but a few first steps to incorporating happiness-producing habits in our lives. I know you'll come up with countless more.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Truly happy people though, understand that they have the power to cultivate authentic happiness and become more optimistic about the future. These people recognize that life will endlessly throw challenges in their path. But they can decide how these challenges affect them. Such people view the future with optimistic hope and excitement as they create the life they want to live, creating joy from within.
So, what does it take to be happy from within?
Here are some simple suggestions to get you on track:
First and paramount, make happiness a habit, a way of life. Happiness is a choice that needs to be made every day, every hour, and even every minute. Genuinely happy people are so because they choose to be.
Cultivate mindfulness, In striving to be fully present in each moment, you can live a life of greater depth and meaning
Direct your daily thoughts. Thoughts can easily stray or be moulded by other people and factors. Be aware of the thoughts that you believe in as truths. In order to become aware of your thoughts, begin by writing down your thoughts. Then read what you have written and question whether or not these thoughts are helpful to you or realistic. Are they truths based on facts or just your own beliefs?
Live in a state of flow. Author Mihaly csikszentmihalyi suggested that flow is a state in which people are so involved in an activity that nothing else seems to matter. To achieve flow an activity must have the following components: the activity must be challenging, it must be clear in how it will progress meaning that the rules are simple, it must requre all of our concentration, and we must feel we are making progress and are in control. The more flow activities you incorporate into your life, the happier you will feel.
Now this is a really crucial tip - practice forgiveness. It is the path of inner happiness and peace. In genuinely forgiving another person, and don't forget forgiving yourself, you will feel a profound sense of healing. Not to mention more time and energy you can devote to other more rewarding things.
Genuinely happy people know that joy comes from within, not from outside sources. And here are some more ways you can cultivate happiness from within, and choose happiness as a habit, a way of life.
Develop discipline. By overindulging in food, alcohol, sex or other temporary gratifications, a weakening of our mind, body and soul can result. By practicing self discipline in our daily lives, we strengthen our mind and self-image because we promote a feeling that we are in control of our body. By using restraint, we achieve stability which leads to contentment.
Be an optimist. This includes, but is not limited to, perceiving problems as temporary, and not taking things personally. Such optimistic thinkers view the events that happen in their lives as always having a positive side. They choose to believe that ones ability to conquer hardship is determined by how one recovers from a setback. They hold on to the belief that nothing can hold them down permanently.
Simplify your life. Whenever I travel, I end up realising that I've over-packed. Essentially, I'm carting along baggage that I never use and don't really have to use. And look around you - your office, your bedroom. Going through your wardrobe alone should send you into spasms of regret over wasterd money. Life is needlessly bloated and complex these days. To restore a sense of balance to our lives, we must try to do less, own less, worry less and push ourselves and others less. I'm not saying that you should stop reaching for the stars or expecting the best, but if you look critically, there are meny things you can really afford to let go.
Exercise reguarly. Ah... I'm guilty of not doing enough myself. But daily exercise has a huge impact on how positive we feel about ourselves. Giving our body a regular workout helps reduce tension and stress. Regular exercie also helps to reduce fat, improves muscle tone, clears the skin, and promotes a general sense of energy and mobility.
And lastly, give love freely. Everyone loves being loved, and just as crucial, being told they're loved. But expressing love makes us feel good too. There is powerful magic in the sharing of giving and taking that creates great joy. And konwing that the person you love knows that you love him or her is an indescribable feeling that stays with you like a constant umbrella, shielding you from the rain.
These are but a few first steps to incorporating happiness-producing habits in our lives. I know you'll come up with countless more.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Stress Relief at Work
Everyone acknowledges the existence and inevitablity of stress at the workplace, but how many of us really understand the extent of damage it's wreaking?
Even as we speak, millions around the world are on the verge of a breakdown due to work-related stress. And it's not just the workers themselves who take a beating. Some estimates put the loss of GDP due to stress in some developed nations at about 10%! Employees falling sick, employees fearful of going to work, employees not putting in their best effort, all these cripple productivity.
Managers have the duty to monitor stress levels in the workforce, identify the factors that cause stress, and take firm measures to reduce it. The top factors that increase stress at work include: poor working conditions (e.g. long hours, travel, noises, smells, work overload and work underload), a lack of clear role in the company (e.g. ill-defined expectations, conflicting priorities and responsibility for others), and poor relationships at work (e.g. low levels of trust and lack of support).
In order to reduce and prevent stress at work:
1. Employees should have genuine control over their work and be allowed an appropriate degree of self-management of workload.
2. Roles, responsibilities and expectations should be fully defined.
3. Employees should have a role in planning and decision making.
4. The physical workplace environment should be of a high standard, including natural light where possible, good ventilation, and good health and safety practices.
5. Employees should be actively discouraged from working excessively long hours.
Although there are many ways of relieving stress outside the office, only a few techniques are suitable for use in the workplace. One method that can be used in a work environment is aromatherapy. Many essential oils are recognised for their stress-relieving effects, and can help aid concentration and focus, and improve productivity and mood. Candles will most certainly be frowned upon by your Fire Safety Officer, but there are plenty of electric oil diffusers available that don't require burning.
Try oils like lavender, rosemary and orange, all of them known to reduce anxiety, depression and fatigue, and aid clarity, balance, relaxation and rejuvenation.
How else can you enhance your workplace to increase worker well-being and productivity?
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Even as we speak, millions around the world are on the verge of a breakdown due to work-related stress. And it's not just the workers themselves who take a beating. Some estimates put the loss of GDP due to stress in some developed nations at about 10%! Employees falling sick, employees fearful of going to work, employees not putting in their best effort, all these cripple productivity.
Managers have the duty to monitor stress levels in the workforce, identify the factors that cause stress, and take firm measures to reduce it. The top factors that increase stress at work include: poor working conditions (e.g. long hours, travel, noises, smells, work overload and work underload), a lack of clear role in the company (e.g. ill-defined expectations, conflicting priorities and responsibility for others), and poor relationships at work (e.g. low levels of trust and lack of support).
In order to reduce and prevent stress at work:
1. Employees should have genuine control over their work and be allowed an appropriate degree of self-management of workload.
2. Roles, responsibilities and expectations should be fully defined.
3. Employees should have a role in planning and decision making.
4. The physical workplace environment should be of a high standard, including natural light where possible, good ventilation, and good health and safety practices.
5. Employees should be actively discouraged from working excessively long hours.
Although there are many ways of relieving stress outside the office, only a few techniques are suitable for use in the workplace. One method that can be used in a work environment is aromatherapy. Many essential oils are recognised for their stress-relieving effects, and can help aid concentration and focus, and improve productivity and mood. Candles will most certainly be frowned upon by your Fire Safety Officer, but there are plenty of electric oil diffusers available that don't require burning.
Try oils like lavender, rosemary and orange, all of them known to reduce anxiety, depression and fatigue, and aid clarity, balance, relaxation and rejuvenation.
How else can you enhance your workplace to increase worker well-being and productivity?
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Recovering from a Disastrous First Date
First dates. Most of us have experienced our fair share of less than favourable ones. In fact, some of them might even be described as "disastrous". Meeting a romantic prospect for the first time is a tricky endeavour, and if it doesn't go well, the effects could stay with you a long, long time. For some, the memory of disastrous first dates is enough to make them a nervous wreck on subsequent dates.
so what can you do to receover from a disastrous first date?
First and most crucial, forgive yourself. Most of us, when under stress, do things we wouldn't normally do. If you thought you talked too much, or not enough, if you laughed too much, overreacted to some statement, or done some incredibly unattractive thing, don't be too hard on yourself. We're often harder on ourselves than we would be on another person.
So show some compassion toward yourself. It's natural to feel nervous on a first date. And nobody gets everything right, not even people who are attractive, intelligent and confident. The only reason why these people seem to fare better than others is that they forgive themselves more readily, and get over awkward situations more easily.
Once you've learnt to forgive yourself for not performing as well as you would've liked on a first date, you can go on to forgive the other person. Yes, we may like to believe that we don't pre-judge or judge people superficially, but on some subconscious level, we all do. And that can very often spoil an otherwise great date. So do not expect the other person to live up to all your expectations. By taking for granted that first dates usually don't go well, you take a big step forward in emotional maturity. Unless the other person was abusive or rude, they deserve a second chance.
Now, if you did something awkward or that warrants an apology, follow up with a gift or flowers and a simple note of apology or explanation. Don't wirte off your chances simply because you think you did something out of line. Most people are more forgiving than you think, and besides, your willingness to try again might impress the other party.
And don't let experience affect your self-confidence. You have many good qualities, and just because this person didn't recognize them, that doesn't mean there isn't someone else out there who can. The most important thing is to be honest, be your authentic self. You deserve someone who will appreciate for who you really are.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
so what can you do to receover from a disastrous first date?
First and most crucial, forgive yourself. Most of us, when under stress, do things we wouldn't normally do. If you thought you talked too much, or not enough, if you laughed too much, overreacted to some statement, or done some incredibly unattractive thing, don't be too hard on yourself. We're often harder on ourselves than we would be on another person.
So show some compassion toward yourself. It's natural to feel nervous on a first date. And nobody gets everything right, not even people who are attractive, intelligent and confident. The only reason why these people seem to fare better than others is that they forgive themselves more readily, and get over awkward situations more easily.
Once you've learnt to forgive yourself for not performing as well as you would've liked on a first date, you can go on to forgive the other person. Yes, we may like to believe that we don't pre-judge or judge people superficially, but on some subconscious level, we all do. And that can very often spoil an otherwise great date. So do not expect the other person to live up to all your expectations. By taking for granted that first dates usually don't go well, you take a big step forward in emotional maturity. Unless the other person was abusive or rude, they deserve a second chance.
Now, if you did something awkward or that warrants an apology, follow up with a gift or flowers and a simple note of apology or explanation. Don't wirte off your chances simply because you think you did something out of line. Most people are more forgiving than you think, and besides, your willingness to try again might impress the other party.
And don't let experience affect your self-confidence. You have many good qualities, and just because this person didn't recognize them, that doesn't mean there isn't someone else out there who can. The most important thing is to be honest, be your authentic self. You deserve someone who will appreciate for who you really are.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Helping A Stressed Loved One
Stress and depression can afflict anyone, and it can be especially tough to handle when it's our loved one who's suffering. When it seems all our words and deeds do nothing to assuage their misert, we ourselves can feel helpless and desperate.
If you're living with a loved one who's under severe stress of suffering from depression, remember that recovery is a journey, it's a work in progress, so if improvement does not seem apparent, don't be disappointed. No matter how useless you may be feeling, your loved one appreciates your support and listening ear.
Every comforting or encouraging word is helpful, but however frustrated you feel, never say to a depressed or stressed person: "Come on, snap out of it! What have you got to be worried or sad about anyway? People have it much worse than you!"
Understand that these words are easy enough for you to say, but for a stressed or depressed person, they can seem as though you're trivializing their condition, making them seem weak for not being able to "snap out" of such a petty state. Severe stress and chronic depression are illnesses. You wouldn't tell someone with high blood pressure or pneumonia to "snap out" of their condition, would you?
Also, try as much as possible not to impose advice or your own analysis or knowledge of the problem onto your loved one. Your suggestions may be in the best interest, but to the sufferer, it can sound confrontational. This may put him or her under pressure. all they'll do is dismiss your comments and clam up whenever you're around as they'll feel they're being scrutinized.
A better way is to challenge them very gently by reminding them of a time when they did something good. For example, when you hear your loved one say: "I'm useless, I never get anything right.", you can say "Sure you do, hey, remember the time when you did this...?"
Finally, you may find a resource - a book, a video, or supplement that you think will help someone to beat their illness. But you must resist the urge to directly give them these resources. For someone to emerge from these illnesses, they have to make the decision themselves. A direct offer will more often than not be refused. So, if you find something you think will help, leave it lying around somewhere your loved on will find it. Such an indirect approach is more effective because once again, there is no pressure, no reminder, no confrontation, It is the sufferer who takes a willing first step towards recovery.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
If you're living with a loved one who's under severe stress of suffering from depression, remember that recovery is a journey, it's a work in progress, so if improvement does not seem apparent, don't be disappointed. No matter how useless you may be feeling, your loved one appreciates your support and listening ear.
Every comforting or encouraging word is helpful, but however frustrated you feel, never say to a depressed or stressed person: "Come on, snap out of it! What have you got to be worried or sad about anyway? People have it much worse than you!"
Understand that these words are easy enough for you to say, but for a stressed or depressed person, they can seem as though you're trivializing their condition, making them seem weak for not being able to "snap out" of such a petty state. Severe stress and chronic depression are illnesses. You wouldn't tell someone with high blood pressure or pneumonia to "snap out" of their condition, would you?
Also, try as much as possible not to impose advice or your own analysis or knowledge of the problem onto your loved one. Your suggestions may be in the best interest, but to the sufferer, it can sound confrontational. This may put him or her under pressure. all they'll do is dismiss your comments and clam up whenever you're around as they'll feel they're being scrutinized.
A better way is to challenge them very gently by reminding them of a time when they did something good. For example, when you hear your loved one say: "I'm useless, I never get anything right.", you can say "Sure you do, hey, remember the time when you did this...?"
Finally, you may find a resource - a book, a video, or supplement that you think will help someone to beat their illness. But you must resist the urge to directly give them these resources. For someone to emerge from these illnesses, they have to make the decision themselves. A direct offer will more often than not be refused. So, if you find something you think will help, leave it lying around somewhere your loved on will find it. Such an indirect approach is more effective because once again, there is no pressure, no reminder, no confrontation, It is the sufferer who takes a willing first step towards recovery.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
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