Most of the problems in the world today stem from a fundamental malaise of Mankind that the centuries have not been able to cure. Our tendency to be overly-concerned about other people - their flaws, their injustices, their immorality - and not caring enough about our own weakness and what we can do about them.
Murder, racial and religious intolerance, revenge attacks, bomb blasts... these all have roots in our refusal to critically examine ourselves first before judging others. Leader of the world continue to condemn these acts and the perpetrators continue to justify their behaviour, but we are no close to resolving age-old conflicts.
The truth is, the world has always been torn by strife and clashes, civilisations rise and fall, good intentions get corrupted by self-righteousness, greed and power and revenge continues to breed more and more revenge. In fact, the history of Man has been a history of repetition. We come, we conquer, we plunder, we use up, then go find some other place to feed our cravings or someone else to blame.
If we could all stop thinking about the blaming others for our problems and begin to focus more on ourselves and and our self-development, I'm sure the world would be a much better place. The problem with focusing on others is that it's a convenient distraction from our own flaws. While we are preoccupied with others, we don't have time to think about our own shortcomings and therefore don't have to do anything about them.
It's weakness of character, because it takes courage to look within, discover our own flaws and work towards improving ourselves.
If we want others to change, we must first change ourselves. We can only lead by example. This is as true of parent and child relationships as it is with politician and citizen, boss and subordinate, believer and non-believer. Nothing will make others see our point of view unless we can prove just how clearly we see it ourselves. Whether you believe in God or not is a personal choice - only you can see it, only you can feel it or not; you don't need anyone for that. And why should it matter to you how others think as long as it doesn't affect the way you think?
Starting now, try to shift your focus from other people onto yourself. Think about how you can be a better person. How you can reach for that deeper humanity in you.
As respected author and speaker Stephen Covey once said, "We immediately become more effective when we decide to change ourselves rather than asking things to change for us."
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Showing posts with label Change. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Change. Show all posts
Thinking Beyond Current Standards
It's natural to be satisfied with the way things are, especially when things are going well, life is smooth-sailing, there are no viable competitors and there isn't incentive to charge anything.
But Life is about change. It's about constant movement, and if you are not moving forward all the time, you are either stuck, or worse, sliding. Besides, when we settle, we give up the chance to find out how things could be.
One of the most striking examples of how important constant evolution is in the business of electronic gadgets. Who would have thought that smartphones, for instance, would take over the world, almost overnight it seems? And you can be sure that the Jobs' and Gates' of the world are already thinking of the next super communication slash entertainment tool that defies convention and would be unimaginable to most of us today.
That's the essence of success - consistently staying a few steps ahead.
Most people will be happy with current standards. There is certain reverence given to them it seems... We often hears terms like "time-tested", "classic", "tested and proven", "traditional" and so on when it comes to the way things have always been done.
This love for the status quo occurs not just in career or business. People can become attached to the prevailing standard in their personal lives as well - they can become attached to places, to environments, to possessions, to ideas, to other people, to repetitious acts that give them temporary or superficial pleasure.
These people can get sucked into this artificial world - a world where things don't change, where things and people remain where they want them to be, a world where any change is snuffed out forcefully or artificially. While the real world continues to move on, they retreat deeper and deeper into their artificial world until they become obsolete and out of touch within the real world.
The truth is - the world moves on, people move on, fads come and go, technologies emerge and fade, cultures and contexts evolve. Over time, things and people who don't steadily develop themselves will get left behind.
The only way you can remain ahead of the game is to constantly thing beyond the current standards - once things become relatively stable, it's time to think about how they can be done better, how they can be further enhanced.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
But Life is about change. It's about constant movement, and if you are not moving forward all the time, you are either stuck, or worse, sliding. Besides, when we settle, we give up the chance to find out how things could be.
One of the most striking examples of how important constant evolution is in the business of electronic gadgets. Who would have thought that smartphones, for instance, would take over the world, almost overnight it seems? And you can be sure that the Jobs' and Gates' of the world are already thinking of the next super communication slash entertainment tool that defies convention and would be unimaginable to most of us today.
That's the essence of success - consistently staying a few steps ahead.
Most people will be happy with current standards. There is certain reverence given to them it seems... We often hears terms like "time-tested", "classic", "tested and proven", "traditional" and so on when it comes to the way things have always been done.
This love for the status quo occurs not just in career or business. People can become attached to the prevailing standard in their personal lives as well - they can become attached to places, to environments, to possessions, to ideas, to other people, to repetitious acts that give them temporary or superficial pleasure.
These people can get sucked into this artificial world - a world where things don't change, where things and people remain where they want them to be, a world where any change is snuffed out forcefully or artificially. While the real world continues to move on, they retreat deeper and deeper into their artificial world until they become obsolete and out of touch within the real world.
The truth is - the world moves on, people move on, fads come and go, technologies emerge and fade, cultures and contexts evolve. Over time, things and people who don't steadily develop themselves will get left behind.
The only way you can remain ahead of the game is to constantly thing beyond the current standards - once things become relatively stable, it's time to think about how they can be done better, how they can be further enhanced.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Taking Stock of Your Life
The modern person is faced with an unprecedented myriad of influences, expectations, and pressures. We can often feel like we are being pulled in all directions - by our parents, our jobs, our spouse, our boss, our children, our needs vs theirs, my rights vs. yours.
We all feel we have expectations and obligations that we have to fulfill... people we have to satisfy, standards we have to achieve, authority figures we have to impress, toxic people we have to put up with, rules we have to follow, people we have to influence, friends we have to win.
We may not feel as if these pressures are particularly terrorizing, but collectively they can exert a profound hold over us. They can distract us from our own dreams and desires, our own unique path towards fulfillment. That's often the reason why we feel discontented and lost.
Well, it's time to take stock of your life - what's working?, and build on that, what's not working, and get it out of the way, and what else you can do to help you become the optimum person you can be.
First of all, imagine yourself as the premise for all things. Where previously you deferred to others in terms of opinions, standards and decisions, now think critically about how you really feel, about yourself, your needs, where your life is going. Is this the life you really want, or the one you have been conditioned to desire? Listen to yourself and start making your needs your priority.
Begin identifying the toxic and negative people in your life. How are they draining your energy and keeping you from moving on to the next level? Sometimes these people are your family members or friends. It does not matter... if they are holding you back in a negative way, then let them know that you will do what's best for you, that you value them as loved ones, but it's your own life and only you can live it, for better or worse. And if these negative people are simply the people you hang out with for some reason, then stop indulging the reason to be around them.
You know we often act a certain way because it's we think it's "polite", it's "right", or it's "expected", when really all this "politeness", "rightness" or whatever isn't getting us anywhere, and is probably holding us back from other more important things.
So, do something for yourself today - critically take stock of your life and decide on a path that's right for you!
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
We all feel we have expectations and obligations that we have to fulfill... people we have to satisfy, standards we have to achieve, authority figures we have to impress, toxic people we have to put up with, rules we have to follow, people we have to influence, friends we have to win.
We may not feel as if these pressures are particularly terrorizing, but collectively they can exert a profound hold over us. They can distract us from our own dreams and desires, our own unique path towards fulfillment. That's often the reason why we feel discontented and lost.
Well, it's time to take stock of your life - what's working?, and build on that, what's not working, and get it out of the way, and what else you can do to help you become the optimum person you can be.
First of all, imagine yourself as the premise for all things. Where previously you deferred to others in terms of opinions, standards and decisions, now think critically about how you really feel, about yourself, your needs, where your life is going. Is this the life you really want, or the one you have been conditioned to desire? Listen to yourself and start making your needs your priority.
Begin identifying the toxic and negative people in your life. How are they draining your energy and keeping you from moving on to the next level? Sometimes these people are your family members or friends. It does not matter... if they are holding you back in a negative way, then let them know that you will do what's best for you, that you value them as loved ones, but it's your own life and only you can live it, for better or worse. And if these negative people are simply the people you hang out with for some reason, then stop indulging the reason to be around them.
You know we often act a certain way because it's we think it's "polite", it's "right", or it's "expected", when really all this "politeness", "rightness" or whatever isn't getting us anywhere, and is probably holding us back from other more important things.
So, do something for yourself today - critically take stock of your life and decide on a path that's right for you!
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Embracing Challenges
None of us can avoid challenges. It is one of the irrefutable truths that life doesn't stay rosy for long. Even for those of us who are blessed with lengthy periods of undisturbed bliss, there will come a time when summer sun must wane, the leaves will fall, and we must prepare to endure a period of cold and darkness.
Challenges are inevitable. Whenever life presents a challenge, do you ignore it? Or do you embrace it? If it is your practice to consistently ignore the challenges that come your way, you can be sure they will emerge again and again, and in more daunting forms.
Consider a case of financial difficulty, for example, which requires a period of belt-tightening and sacrifice. If you choose to ignore the challenge and continue to live on credit, you can be sure that you financial situation will only get worse. But what if you choose to embrace the challenge instead? Come up with a plan to reduce costs, change your habits and lifestyle, monetize one of your skills. You would not only survive the crisis in a stable financial position, you will probably have even more money than before! And because you have a sound financial security infrastructure in place, the next time a financial challenge comes along, you would be better placed to deal with it. This is growth. This is self-improvement.
What about the other challenges in life?
For example, if you fall sick easily or often feel weak and tired, think about what aspects of your lifestyle may be causing it. Could you get into a fitness routine, wean yourself off addictive substances and try to eat more healthy? The beginning will be tough, but all it takes is action and commitment, and believe me, the new you that will emerge from this will not believe why you didn't start sooner! You may have been convinced that your former life was what you needed, but once you let it go, whole new opportunities will open up for you. Once dull and tasteless things will give you new pleasures. You will feel better, be happier and more efficient.
Think of other aspects of your life you can change for the better. What about your fears? Fear of being alone, fear of letting your parents down, fear of switching careers, fear of failure, fear of expressing yourself, fear of putting yourself out there, fear of being the person you really are? How many times has life thrown challenges at you to help you get rid of those fears and you ignored them? How are those fears keeping you trapped in a place you really don't want to be?
Challenges help you grow. They nudge out your weaknesses and force you to turn them into strengths. When overcome, they give you that priceless sense of achievement and confidence; that increasing sense of self-value that will continue to help you attain more fulfillment and success in life.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Challenges are inevitable. Whenever life presents a challenge, do you ignore it? Or do you embrace it? If it is your practice to consistently ignore the challenges that come your way, you can be sure they will emerge again and again, and in more daunting forms.
Consider a case of financial difficulty, for example, which requires a period of belt-tightening and sacrifice. If you choose to ignore the challenge and continue to live on credit, you can be sure that you financial situation will only get worse. But what if you choose to embrace the challenge instead? Come up with a plan to reduce costs, change your habits and lifestyle, monetize one of your skills. You would not only survive the crisis in a stable financial position, you will probably have even more money than before! And because you have a sound financial security infrastructure in place, the next time a financial challenge comes along, you would be better placed to deal with it. This is growth. This is self-improvement.
What about the other challenges in life?
For example, if you fall sick easily or often feel weak and tired, think about what aspects of your lifestyle may be causing it. Could you get into a fitness routine, wean yourself off addictive substances and try to eat more healthy? The beginning will be tough, but all it takes is action and commitment, and believe me, the new you that will emerge from this will not believe why you didn't start sooner! You may have been convinced that your former life was what you needed, but once you let it go, whole new opportunities will open up for you. Once dull and tasteless things will give you new pleasures. You will feel better, be happier and more efficient.
Think of other aspects of your life you can change for the better. What about your fears? Fear of being alone, fear of letting your parents down, fear of switching careers, fear of failure, fear of expressing yourself, fear of putting yourself out there, fear of being the person you really are? How many times has life thrown challenges at you to help you get rid of those fears and you ignored them? How are those fears keeping you trapped in a place you really don't want to be?
Challenges help you grow. They nudge out your weaknesses and force you to turn them into strengths. When overcome, they give you that priceless sense of achievement and confidence; that increasing sense of self-value that will continue to help you attain more fulfillment and success in life.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Changing Your Perception
Albert Einstein famously remarked "There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is."
Einstein was referring to perception and how every often, how well or how badly you feel about something is due entirely to the way you see it. You can instantly change your emotional state by changing the way you perceive the situation.
We live in an age of unprecedented equality - many of us have access to the same opportunities to improve our lives. Yet we find there is a whole spectrum of people stuck between Depressed and Joyful, between Yearning for More and Contented. Two persons can have the same experience and response very differently.
Scientists used to believe that we respond to information flowing into the brain, but we now know, scientifically, that it is actually our interpretation of the information that determines our response. Our past experiences create an expectancy that is primarily based on what we "know" and what we "know" is that which has happened before.
Our belief system is one of the main ways in which our minds make sense of the world. A belief is a sense of certainty about what something means and they're mostly formed and hardened by past experiences. In essence, we make expectations about something based on what's happened before. For example, you might believe that you never get second dates because no one's agreed to it in the past. As a result, you go for that first date with gloomy forecast of what's to come and don't make any effort to encourage a second date. After the date, you don't follow-up or call to arrange another meeting. Needless to say, a second date doesn't happen. You believe it's because you're undesirable, but the real reason is simply that your limiting belief had caused you to sabotage your own chance!
Perception is a way of grasping and making sense of the "realities" around us. Perception links a meaning to what you take in with your senses that allows you to have the experience in your nervous system. Because perception is based on interpretation we can change it.
A change in perception is what turns the half empty glass into a half full glass. Perception explains how two people can have exactly the same experience and one commits suicide while the other becomes an inspiration for generations to come. Whatever you perceive is going to be true for you, regardless of what you see. Change your beliefs, change your perceptions, and you can change your life.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Einstein was referring to perception and how every often, how well or how badly you feel about something is due entirely to the way you see it. You can instantly change your emotional state by changing the way you perceive the situation.
We live in an age of unprecedented equality - many of us have access to the same opportunities to improve our lives. Yet we find there is a whole spectrum of people stuck between Depressed and Joyful, between Yearning for More and Contented. Two persons can have the same experience and response very differently.
Scientists used to believe that we respond to information flowing into the brain, but we now know, scientifically, that it is actually our interpretation of the information that determines our response. Our past experiences create an expectancy that is primarily based on what we "know" and what we "know" is that which has happened before.
Our belief system is one of the main ways in which our minds make sense of the world. A belief is a sense of certainty about what something means and they're mostly formed and hardened by past experiences. In essence, we make expectations about something based on what's happened before. For example, you might believe that you never get second dates because no one's agreed to it in the past. As a result, you go for that first date with gloomy forecast of what's to come and don't make any effort to encourage a second date. After the date, you don't follow-up or call to arrange another meeting. Needless to say, a second date doesn't happen. You believe it's because you're undesirable, but the real reason is simply that your limiting belief had caused you to sabotage your own chance!
Perception is a way of grasping and making sense of the "realities" around us. Perception links a meaning to what you take in with your senses that allows you to have the experience in your nervous system. Because perception is based on interpretation we can change it.
A change in perception is what turns the half empty glass into a half full glass. Perception explains how two people can have exactly the same experience and one commits suicide while the other becomes an inspiration for generations to come. Whatever you perceive is going to be true for you, regardless of what you see. Change your beliefs, change your perceptions, and you can change your life.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Managing Life Changes
It's funny that in such a constantly-changing world that not more of us have naturally developed the aptitude to deal with it more effectively. Or has our love for consistency evolved as a defense against the reality of an ever-shifting world? Has our hear of change compelled us to construct schedules, routines, limits and borders? Is this an attempt to delay change?
Whatever the reason, it certainly seems odd that human beings are not more biologically-wired to deal with change. Sure, some of us seem to thrive on constant change, but most of us are undoubtedly more comfortable with consistency. For some of us, the fear of change can be downright crippling, so how can we learn to manage change more effectively?
Well, first it's important to understand what our stress over change comes from. This stress essentially is our body telling our mind that there's something we need to deal with that we have not experienced before, that we may need to adapt to, and that we may not be adequately prepared for. So what does this tell us?
Firstly, that we need to keep ourselves prepared for change. This means keeping our mind and body in optimum condition to deal with any adjustments. Which means eating right, keeping fit, and getting enough sleep. That takes care of our body; as for our mind, we need to maintain its resource level at a healthy high. This entails maintaining a store of knowledge, and regularly challenging our mind to think quickly and creatively. We can do this by reading widely, and by interacting with people whom we find intellectually-challenging.
We also need to develop some relaxation techniques that we can regularly balance our spirit with, and even use when confronting the change itself. You'll have to find that works for you, but for most people, this simple trick seems to work - most of the time, when we're stressed, our breathing inadvertently becomes faster and that actually stresses us even more.
So when in a stressful situation, try focusing on and slowing down your breathing. Imagine the progress of each breath as drawing one side of a square and make each line last four seconds. Inhale, 2, 3, 4 and exhale, 2, 3, 4... and repeat. You'll find yourself becoming calmer. Other people swear by meditation, yoga, journaling, walking or listening to soothing music.
And when potentially faced with a stressful change, try to get a clearer picture of it. The more you understand something, the less frightening it usually becomes. This is how, over time, we become familiar with initially-strange surroundings as well.
And finally, ask yourself "What's the worst that can happen, really?" You'll find that most of the time, the consequences aren't that bad. They're not something you can't live down. Besides, with change comes other possibilities that will actually be pleasant or beneficial for you. Try focusing on those.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
Whatever the reason, it certainly seems odd that human beings are not more biologically-wired to deal with change. Sure, some of us seem to thrive on constant change, but most of us are undoubtedly more comfortable with consistency. For some of us, the fear of change can be downright crippling, so how can we learn to manage change more effectively?
Well, first it's important to understand what our stress over change comes from. This stress essentially is our body telling our mind that there's something we need to deal with that we have not experienced before, that we may need to adapt to, and that we may not be adequately prepared for. So what does this tell us?
Firstly, that we need to keep ourselves prepared for change. This means keeping our mind and body in optimum condition to deal with any adjustments. Which means eating right, keeping fit, and getting enough sleep. That takes care of our body; as for our mind, we need to maintain its resource level at a healthy high. This entails maintaining a store of knowledge, and regularly challenging our mind to think quickly and creatively. We can do this by reading widely, and by interacting with people whom we find intellectually-challenging.
We also need to develop some relaxation techniques that we can regularly balance our spirit with, and even use when confronting the change itself. You'll have to find that works for you, but for most people, this simple trick seems to work - most of the time, when we're stressed, our breathing inadvertently becomes faster and that actually stresses us even more.
So when in a stressful situation, try focusing on and slowing down your breathing. Imagine the progress of each breath as drawing one side of a square and make each line last four seconds. Inhale, 2, 3, 4 and exhale, 2, 3, 4... and repeat. You'll find yourself becoming calmer. Other people swear by meditation, yoga, journaling, walking or listening to soothing music.
And when potentially faced with a stressful change, try to get a clearer picture of it. The more you understand something, the less frightening it usually becomes. This is how, over time, we become familiar with initially-strange surroundings as well.
And finally, ask yourself "What's the worst that can happen, really?" You'll find that most of the time, the consequences aren't that bad. They're not something you can't live down. Besides, with change comes other possibilities that will actually be pleasant or beneficial for you. Try focusing on those.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
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