And surely there is something there that makes you give up something you like or need so that your partner can benefit from it.
There is probably something at work too when you refrain from doing something because you think it might hurt your partner.
Some people say it's a chemical, a biological process; that it's indistinguishable from the pleasure you get from sinking your teeth into a scoop of moist chocolate lava cake.
Well, chemical process or not, love fro many of us is still mysterious, though centuries of practice have taught us some of the more profound truths of deeply caring of deeply caring for someone or, in some cases, an exceptionally well-made confectionery.
Love is not about needing someone to be there, but to be there for that person.
Love is not about how much time you have spent together, but how well you two seem to "fir".
Love is not about finding the perfect partner. It is about being the best person you can be.
Love is not just about being together. It's also about letting go.
As we learn more and more about love, we realise that it is not just a flutter of emotions, Byronesque sonnets, passionate kisses or warm embraces. In face, there is also much pain, heartache and sacrifice. Just like the line in that Burt Bacharach song that goes "What do you get when you kiss a guy? You get enough germs to catch pneumonia"!
You cannot compel love. You cannot court love and expect it to fly into your arms. Nor can you trap in a jar like a butterfly that will not doubt soon die anyway. You can only be loving, and hope that someone can see that love and appreciate it.
Love is infinite. It does not diminish even when you are giving it away freely. In fact, the more you share, the more you create and receive.
"Love" is not a word you say to someone if it's not love you feel. And if it truly is love, then it need not be spoken at all!
To love someone is to want the best for someone, even if that "best" thing isn't you.
Love can hurt and love can heal. The results are entirely up to you.
So make your relationships richer and more rewarding with this deeper understanding of love. Even if you are alone at the moment, you have always got that chocolate lava cake!
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
