Is low self-esteem ruining your life?
How we regard ourselves is crucial to our happiness and success. If you have a poor self-image, and regularly say negative things to yourself, your sub-conscious mind will start to believe in them. This can lead to a distorted view of reality, and very often, you can invite problems simply by believing in them.
Have you heard of the self-fulfilling prophecy? When we form negative perceptions of ourselves (or others, for that matter), we communicate these perceptions to ourselves through various cues or signals. These can be words, or actions, like sighing, walking with a hunch, or a weak handshake. You will sub-consciously respond to these cues by adjusting your behaviour to match them and the result is that the original perception translates into reality. Other people will also adjust their behaviour or attitude towards you according to the cues you send them. For example, if you're always sighing, you may convey the impression that you're pessimistic, passive, and that you have many problems. Consequently, people may avoid you or you may be passed over for a promotion because you appear incompetent.
Check your talk! Do you often say things like "I can't", "I'm not that good", "I'm scared", and so on? Do you frequently put yourself down in front of others? If you have a low opinion of yourself, you'll attract friends and lovers who echo your ideas, take advantage of you, belittle you and hurt you.
Remember, the subconscious mind will act on an inaccurate concept as if it were true. If you've accepted an idea that you can't lose weight, stop smoking, make money, succeed, can't paint or anything else, then your subconscious will make sure that the belief gets justified. It'll attract situations that will verify your beliefs.
The good news is that these false concepts can be changed. It takes persistence and consistency, but by using affirmations, you can change the incorrect facts. The first step is to recognize what erroneous ideas you're acting on in the present. Where are they holding you back? Without identifying the problem, you can't move to the solution.
Examine the thoughts that come into your mind when you're about to succeed at whatever goal you have. If they're negative thoughts about you or your goal, those are the incorrect assumptions you've been acting on. Then create a positive statement that counters the negative one. This is your affirmation that you use whenever you think of your goal.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
