From dating agencies and gender-specific magazines to websites with special programs that help you narrow down your prospects, there is a glut of information on how to find that perfect mate.
It can all be rather overwhelming... the do's, the don'ts, the proper grooming, what to wear, what wine to order with your main, how to act when this happens, what to say when your date asks you that.
The irony is that all these considerations often end up making you nervous and jittery on the date. And because you are so caught up with delivering a perfect performance, you stop being authentic and natural. And at the end of the day, what we are all looking for is someone who is sincere and real.
So the best thing to do on a date is to be yourself. Keep it simple and real. If it's something that's really not "you", something that you cannot sustain or are really not keen on, don't do it. Keeping up appearances may work initially, but in the long run, you really want someone who appreciates the real you.
Many of us worry about running out of things to say, awkward silences or appearing dumb and so on. Well, stop focusing on what to say and simply keep your mind on your date. Show interest in her. Ask questions to find out more about her. We all like talking about ourselves, so let her talk. She'll love it that you're focusing on her and not yourself.
And keep it light. Imagine it as meal with a friend. There is no need to go into heavy topics... talk about movies, music, hobbies, jobs. Remember, it's just a meal... you're not walking down the aisle with this person. Over-thinking often gets in the way of a good time.
So keep it simple, keep it real, and keep it light.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
