At the workplace particularly, we can find ourselves in the firing line.
Whether it's our supervisor, a co-worker or a business associate, there will times when someone will disagree with some aspect of you or your work and express that view, sometimes not in the most pleasant of terms.
So what do we do? Do we counter attack? Do we defend ourselves vigorously? Or do we let it slide?
Well, first of all, consider if the disapproval is worth reaching to.
People often say things without thinking, sometimes to distract others from their own shrinking egos.
If you think the remark warrants some self-defense, then do so briefly and calmly. Sometimes, an attack is launched simply to provoke an emotionally charged reaction that may work against you. Generally though, don't take these jibes personally - you are not in a soap opera, you are not in primary school.
Criticism is a fact of life and as mature adults, we should take it sensibly and in our stride.
Next, remove the messenger from the picture and consider the criticism objectively.
Is there a modicum of truth in it? Sometimes, it takes an external party to zero in on that microscopic clot that may one day turn into a stroke. So be thankful that someone has pointed it out. In fact, actually thank the person who made the criticism. This shows that whatever sinister ploy to hurt you has failed and that you are sensible and mature person who can admit his own weaknesses and take steps to improve himself.
And do take the opportunity to improve yourself. Become all the better and stronger for it.
You know, not all criticism is meant to bring you down... sometimes, the aim is genuine problem-resolution. Sometimes, the other person is simply taking an objective stand.
Sometimes, he really has your interests at heart, but just doesn't employ the most tactful delivery. It's really in your benefit to be grateful that someone cared enough to let you know where you are going wrong or what you need to work on.
If you do think the criticism warrants a response though, then do so decisively.
Don't sweep it under the carpet or ignore the big elephant in the room.
Misunderstanding or not, a mature face-to-face talk will clear the air and help diffuse tensions.
Eugine Loh, 938Live, MediaCorp Pte Ltd
